Monday, June 04, 2007

Is there a "Major Life Change Fairy" in our family??

It's just too bizarre. I have to believe there's something in the genes, which has waited until now to emerge, affecting spouses and cousins of our family. I do have a theory. I believe one of the homemade bombs my brothers made as teenagers caused a fluke in the genes (this also affected cousin Jim). It all started with that harmless little pipe bomb, forever setting in motion a chain of events that has just now, 15 years later, begun to disrupt all of our lives.

Don't tell me it's coincidence. I place the blame firmly on the Brothers and Cousin and their insane experiments.

Here are the events as I see them. They began almost exactly a year ago, to date.

#1. Charles, through a strange series of events, moves overseas to Guam with a 3-year teaching contract. Being younger and more susceptible, he was affected earliest.
#2. Emily and Jeff, homebodies and longtime residents of Greenville, get an urge to pick up and move to Atlanta. (Apparently those in any proximity were affected by this biological timebomb. I happened to be inside playing Chopin, yet we were some of the first targets.)
#3. Abbie discovers she is pregnant. This owing of course to the fact that Jim put the actual bomb together.
#4. Just weeks later, Kimberly is pregnant. It was Laurance that fired the fuse, and his proximity caused this major life change.
#5. Even in Thailand there is no escape. It's encapsulated in the genes. Erin is pregnant with TWINS.
#6. Emily is hit again with a second, more serious symptom. It's not a bladder infection, it's a BABY.
#7. Elizabeth and Kris, long content at their beautiful beach home, accept a job opening for her in Florence. In a whirlwind of events, they uproot and move.
#8. Willie and Laura do not escape. A better job offer in Florence has them even now preparing to sell their house, drop everything and move. (Somehow Will, Elizabeth, and Jim were affected magnetically. The magnetic field recently became stronger, causing them to converge together near Florence. Of course, their spouses were affected as well.)
#9. There is apparently a second magnetic field, affecting the birthdate of two babies (though this is unconfirmed...more details to come later!!)

We still do not know if these events are converging ONCE in a lifetime or if they will happen again. In any case, be forewarned that if one major life change begins with one of the family, prepare yourself for anything. It could be your spouse will announce a career change to NASA astronaut. Perhaps you will find yourself moving to Siberia. Or you may find you are expecting quintuplets. Forewarned is forearmed!

9 comments:

Laura said...

So that's what I can blame all this change on...thanks for letting me know. :-)

So curious about #7...is one Kimberly's early birth?

Anonymous said...

Okay... I have to confess. I'm also quitting my day job to become an interpretive dancer.

Either that, or a part-time model. ;)

rcsnickers said...

Kimberly early birth? More info please!!! Sure her baby shower was fun.

What a list of events. Very exciting year, huh? Moves, babies, lots of babies.

Let's see: I know Ella's birthday is end of June so maybe Kimberly's baby will come on Ella's birthday? What other birthday event is there?
If you go early, you could hit either Grace or Isaiah's birthday.

Letisha

Emily said...

NOOOO...I'm getting a divorce... :D

I was thinking of Abbie's little Faith. In Elizabeth's last post she mentions contractions 30 minutes apart. I'm waiting on pins and needles to find out if she actually had the baby last weekend!

Laura said...

I thought you might be referring to Abbie and Kimberly. As far as I know, she hasn't had her yet.

Elizabeth said...

Abbie and Kimberly could have delivered on the same day (Your mom, me and Bill all have the same b-day) but Jim put her on complete bed rest so he could get one good night sleep before the baby, and that seemed to stall the labor. Abbie was so disappointed, but we all trust God to deliver Faith and Abbie in due time. We just hope she won't have to go until Kimberly's due date...hehehe

LOVED your scientific reasoning and creative numbering...You are too hilarious.

Nene said...

I love your theory...so what's the deal with boys and bombs, anyway?? I think all males feel the overwhelming urge to build a bomb at some point in their lifetime!! :)

Erin said...

Hilarious!!!

Unknown said...

okay, I was way off.... but what wonderful news for the family! He does look precious. Thankful for a safe delivery and family was there.

Not much longer for you! You need to post a baby belly picture!

Letisha